'Matrix & Mevlana' Seminar Draws Hoja's Ire

türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Milliyet Newspaper, 4 October 2017)


They'll change into their matching orange jump-suits shortly.

An event at the Osho Meditation Center in Rumeli Hisar, Istanbul, has
drawn the ire of the family of the Mevlana and his devotees.  The event,
entitled "Matrix & Mevlana", was arranged by Iranian meditation guru
Mareechi Asu and mixes scenes from the Matrix movies with the
thoughts of the Mevlana (!).


Descendant Çelebi even defends the Mevlana's slim, trim figure.

The announcement for the event reads as follows: "Our Matrix &
Mevlana lessons are starting in Istanbul.  We intend to bring mysticism,
art and philosophy together.  The prison that the mind creates will be
discussed in tandem with how the matrix offers ways out of this prison.
By mixing scenes from the Matrix films with the thoughts of the Mevlana
we will set out on a deep journey inside truth."


Come to think of it, there was lots of whirling in the films...

However, Faruk Hemdem Çelebi, the head of the Mevlana Foundation
and a 22nd generation descendant of the Mevlana, objected strenuously
to the Osho event, saying "Citizens, do give  credence to those who
offer services in the name of the Mevlana such as shaikhs, groups and
meditation or personal development teachers.  We have complained
about rituals being conducted by a number of persons in the name of
the Mevlana, who is a treasure not just for Moslems but for all of
humanity. The event organized by Osho or this person named Asu
has absolutely no relation to the Mevlana.  To evaluated the Mevlana
by watching Matrix movies is nonsense.  Our nation should say 'stop!'
to such a ridiculous thing."

Reached for comment by Milliyet, the Osho center said that the event
had taken place a few days ago and that a second session would be
announced via social media, depending on the demand. 


Ushers waiting for guests to arrive at the Osho Meditation Center.


   

Gamma Butyrolactone (GBL) on the Market

//ed.note: internet version unavailable//

(HaberTürk Newspaper, 3 October 2017)


          A brand you can trust.

Customs agents in Istanbul have increased their operations against the
liquid drug Gamma Butyrolactone (GBL), which has spread dangerously
in the last few months.  The agents followed a 2.75 kilogram shipment of
GBL that was ordered from Lithuania to a hotel in the Sirkeci section of
Fatih district. The person who accepted the cargo, hotel manager Fabien
Azoulay, who is a citizen of both the USA and France, was taken into
custody and jailed.

Agents launched 17 separate operations against GBL and seized 32.7
kilograms of the substance, arresting 21 persons including an architect
and an engineer.  GBL is used for increased sexual performance and is
added drop by drop to soda or fruit juice.  It sells for 200 TL on the street.
GBL is sent to Turkey from places such as Lithuania, Poland and Hong
Kong and is declared to be wheel cleaner or shower gel in order to get
through customs.


        Satisfied customer.

Mosque Shortage in Istanbul!

türkçe links to original Turkish article

(Milliyet Newspaper, 3 October 2017)



The Mufti (official expounder of Islamic law) of Istanbul, Prof. Dr.
Hasan Kâmil Yılmaz, taking note of the fact that there are 3,365
mosques in Istanbul, stated that "I think Istanbul needs at least
10,000 more mosques." (!)

Yılmaz asserted that "there should be one mosque for every 15,000
people in Istanbul so based on Istanbul's current population there
should be 10,000 more mosques.  In some places in Istanbul one
mosque serves 50,000 or 30,000 people.  Especially on special holy
days one cannot find a spot in these overcrowded mosques.  We
have to take steps to address the need for more mosques."

Disproportionate Golden Tummy

 türkçe links to original Turkish article

(HaberTürk Newspaper, 2 October 2017)



                 "What? So I haven't been to the gym in a while..."

In a police operation at Sabiha Gökçen Airport in Istanbul, Georgian
Amınat Madagova was taken into custody because she tried to enter
Turkey with 12.3 kilograms of gold strapped to her midsection.  The
value of the gold is 2 million TL (about $600,000). 

Customs officials at Sabiha Gökçen noticed that Madagova's midsection
was disproportionately large so they searched her and found the gold.
Madagova explained that "the gold belongs to a friend of my sister.
They asked me to take it here."  Madagova has been charged with gold
smuggling.

Roommate Candidate's Brief but Eventful Stay

//ed.note: internet version unavailable//

(HaberTürk Newspaper, 1 October 2017)



"Hey, this milk tastes better than usual...zzzzzzzz"

In Istanbul, when university student Ferhat Akbayrak's roommate moved
out he put an advertisement on the internet for a new one, specifying that
"if you're sensible, we'll get along fine."  A prospective roommate phoned
Akbayrak and explained that "I'm a driver and my workplace is very close."

The candidate came to Akbayrak's residence last weekend and brought
along some alcohol (!).  The two agreed on the deal and began to drink in
celebration.  Shortly thereafter, though, Akbayrak passed out because the
candidate had doped his drink. 

When Akbayrak's mother and girlfriend couldn't reach him they came to
the house and found Akbayrak sound asleep.  His wallet, telephone, TV
and three computers were gone, however.  Police are currently reviewing
surveillance footage for clues.


...commits the perfect crime.
  

'Katzenegger' Pumps Up in Izmir

türkçe links to original Turkish article

(HaberTürk Newspaper, 1 October 2017)




Izmir police received a tip about body-builder Cengiz D., who has placed
second and third in the Turkey Body-Building Championships, to the effect
that he has been bringing raw materials into Turkey illegally, producing
liquid, pill and capsule medicines in his villa and selling them in his
sports club and over the internet.


                      Where's the catnip?

After 3 months of surveillance, police raided Cengiz D.'s villa in Urla.
A search of the villa turned up testosterone and other medicines, along
with apparatus for making and packaging medicines.  In addition, police
found a cat (!) in a cabinet and the doctor accompanying the police
determined that the cat was being used as a guinea pig for Cengiz D.'s
medicines. 

Cengiz D. was taken into custody but subsequently released.


                    Cengiz D. and SuperCat