of Fuad Bey's fellow inmates break into the home of a
Russian girl they've been exchange letters (in French,
written by Fuad Bey) with. The police catch them and
Fuad Bey frets that they may all now be sent to the real
Siberia.//
7 October 1916 Saturday
Yet another holiday in captivity…supposedly
today is a holiday.
Everyone is depressed. There’s a sadness hanging over us all. Souls
and
hearts are foundering within a great distress. All is grief it seems,
everywhere we look there’s
sadness. Our thoughts are filled with such
vexing things that our bodies cannot move
properly. Supposedly today
is a holiday.
No, it’s not a holiday, it’s an inauspicious day that
breeds
endless grief which crushes our existence here in captivity. Yes, today
is a day when my
family in Istanbul is experiencing its blackest, most
torturous day, thinking that I am no
longer. Just as they are living today
in sorrow and pain, I’m the same. I’m thinking of them and
reviving in
my mind the specialness left by sweet memories of the days of my
youth. I’m also
thinking about the future. I’m growing tired from
the exhaustion of my nation and my country
today. I’m not being
crushed in just one spot, it’s all over. Aren’t these the days that
hurt a
person most? I don’t think that today most people are sad, probably
they each have little
problems. Isn’t it so that a person remembers
everything he has seen throughout his life
today?...the time of torment
in one’s life attack the mind more than most or one is aggrieved today
with
the sorrowful memories of times which were thought to have been
pleasant. In short, most
holidays are not days that depress one’s
existence with pain like this. Rather, every day that one lives
happily,
giving peace to the heart, the soul and the mind, are holidays for me…
the weather is nice.
They came from the other houses to visit and
we went too but I couldn’t bring myself to go
anywhere. Today I was
sad, remembering my old life somewhat. In the evening I wrote a short
note to
Halis.
8 October 1916 Sunday
Outside is covered with snow and frost. The
sky is cloudy and gloomy.
Around noon it rained a bit. News: the same as before. Supposedly
there
is turmoil in Turkey. The Russian newspapers are writing that
Yakup Cemal (one of Enver Paşa’s most
influential men) has been
executed and that the Committee of Union and Progress branch in
the
province has been closed down. But we didn’t believe it. A Russian
prisoner escaped from
Turkey. The man fled without difficulty from
Sivas and then via Karahisar, Gümüşhane and past the
forward outposts
to freedom. Supposedly he will write about the cruelty he faced in
Turkey…
...in mid-afternoon there was a big crowd on the street. The reason was
that the child of a priest
from one of the surrounding villages died in the
war. They will take the dead body to the village. The
funeral procession
left town, crossing the bridge over the river. The Russians are respectful
in
spiritual matters. Again there’s a weariness upon me. In fact, Osman
said to me ‘what is this ill
humor over the last couple of days, I’m
wondering. Tell me, are you sick?’ Later he said ‘if you’re
sick let me
give you my blanket, my fur, my raincoat.’ I was embarrassed and
grateful for these words.
Today they came from the other houses to
celebrate the holiday. At night Halis and I had a
chat. I didn’t think at
all today but the traces of old distresses have not yet been erased.
9 October 1916 Monday
The weather is bad,very windy. From morning
until evening there was
an icy rain and then snow. It’s dark outside, the sky is overcast. Today
I caught a bad cold. I washed my handkerchief twice. I was very
uncomfortable. Although Halis
went to get cigarette paper he came back
empty handed. He’s a bit out of sorts. The boots we
gave for repair were
returned, the reason being that the Austrians have been sent to
another
place. What an unlucky coincidence. We had the bread we need for
table d’hote brought from the committee by
means of the married
fellows. When the Russian soldiers became aware of
this all hell broke
loose. But we gave them each a ruble to keep them quiet. What
lowdown,
inhuman jerks! They use very little of the gas they
get from the government and sell the
leftovers, even for a kopek, to
us or to someplace else…revenge! The arguments about tea have
ended.
The deal is signed, sealed. Today the laundry came but the new
underwear I had made
wasn’t with it. At night I patched some
underwear. We didn’t have a German lesson.
10
October 1916 Tuesday
The weather is bad. It’s raining
continually with short breaks.
Everywhere is covered in white. And it’s cold. In the morning we went
to the
bath and got cleaned up. After the bath both Halis and I got very
bad headaches and this
continued until bedtime.
News: according to Müştak, the Germans will make a separate peace
with
the French and give back the territory they have taken…the
American government has summoned
all its ambassadors from all
over…today I wrote some French words. Also today the
collective tea
drinking system was started.
I went to bed after chatting a bit but I couldn’t
sleep at all. At about
4 o’clock, European style, I woke up worriedly to a noise that went on
for an
hour. I kept hearing the refrain that we will be sent to Siberia.
‘What’s going on?’ I asked about the news circulating and then I
understood: Süleyman, Hikmet and Kazim, these three idiots,
decided
to go to the home of the Russian girls they’ve fallen in love with here.
They didn’t give any
thought to the difficulty of this. No matter what
we’ll do it, they said. They set their sights on going
through the window
in the small, dark room. Kazim removed one of the windows on the
second floor and
opened the other. As these love-crazed fools descended
the police saw them and cried out. The
police station was alerted
(there’s a
rumor that this happened because of cries from their friends
Hurşid
and Rıfkı) and before they could do anything there was an
outcry. The Russians stood guard until
morning. Everyone woke up
and as morning approached we gathered together in a dishevled manner.
Osman told the three of them to put on their uniforms and go to the
Command. They didn’t object and
word was sent to the Command.
//END of PART XLVIII//
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